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The Western Leader
Auckland,
Tuesday January 8, 2002.
Summer's the season counsellors dread
by Amy Patterson
Mention the summer holiday season to two Auckland psychotherapists and dread creeps
into their eyes.
Karen Humphris and Diana Robinson listen to more cases of rape and sexual
abuse during December and January than at any other time of year. The
counsellors are part of a team at Auckland Sexual Abuse Help that supports
women and children through crises.
"It's terrible, and New Year - it's a terrible week, and then the
aftermath of that," says Ms Humphris. "We see the world
differently, I suppose, when we deal with those sorts of things."
People are more vulnerable during the season of good will, she says. "It
certainly makes me more aware of what goes on out there, that the rest of the
world doesn't get to see.
"I know people who are outside of here are amazed by how much work we
have," says Ms Humphris.
She and Ms Robinson spend time with victims individually and are also on call
for the crisis team. Links are tangible between alcohol consumption and rape.
Statistics show that drinking alcohol increases the risk of sexual abuse,
particularly for young women aged between 16 and 24 years old. Women in this
age group are six times more likely to be raped than any other group.
Ms Robinson says rape is more frequent during festive seasons when people are
partying. "It's statistics, really. If people get together then there's
the opportunity for it to happen."
Counsellors on the crisis team are often called out to police stations or
hospitals to help victims. They provide support while victims go through their
medical forensic tests and police questioning.
"A lot of times, when women goes to the police, they are surprised when
they feel that they are not being believed," says Ms Robinson.
"Police investigate different angles - and a woman feels a little bit like
they are not believing her. We work with helping them with that
relationship."
The questioning and medical examinations can last up to 14 hours. "Most
of us feel completely wasted after that, and we haven't been traumatised.
It's pretty full on," says Ms Robinson.
"The detail of what's happened is really hard to talk about at that
point. Usually the victim has had no sleep or anything to eat."
Only 7.5 per cent of New
Zealand attacks are reported to the
police, lower than the international average of 10 per cent. Ms Humphris says
many women she helps have not reported their case to the police. "This
happens a lot more than people believe, how women and children are silenced
by their own families, by society, by systems."
Women often blame themselves for the rape or attack. "Some think they
can go on with life as if it didn't happen but counselling can help them,
they think `no, actually it is affecting me'," says Ms Humphris.
Of police reported rapes, only 30 per cent go to court, and of those only 10
per cent result in a conviction. Ms Robinson says the belief that women ask
to be raped is still rampant. "The argument 'she was wearing skimpy
clothing so she was asking for it' is something we come across all the
time," she says.
"People blame themselves, particularly if alcohol is involved. There's
this widespread belief that you asked for it if you were out drinking, which
isn't true. "They have a right to go out drinking of they want to - they
weren't asked to be raped."
Most men who take advantage of an intoxicated woman do not see themselves as
rapists and women can be blamed for being drunk. Once someone accepts the
rape is not their fault, the next hurdle is getting over the attack. "People often feel that because it's
their fault they don't have a right to their feelings. They tell themselves
to forget it and get on with their life," says Ms Robinson.
"They need to realise it's a trauma thing. It's upsetting, they need to
allow themselves to be upset. "It's about giving yourself permission to
actually do that."
There is no set amount of time for a person to recover from rape. It affects
some women and children for years. "We work through the trauma and the
feelings that stick around that. Trauma is a very hard thing to work through
on your own, it just sticks to you and stays there," says Ms Robinson.
"If it happened to them as a child, often that effected things like
their development. If it happened to an adult a lot is based around
trauma."
Counselling people through the trauma of sexual abuse is not a job many would
choose. Ms Robinson says she wants to encourage justice in communities.
"Something that comes up for me is there's a lot of injustice that's out
there. That would be something that drew me to this as a job," she says.
Confidentiality means counsellors cannot talk in detail about their work.
"We talk about it a lot with each other, which is hard because you've
got to keep it confidential."
Ms Humphris says there are success stories from their efforts. "It can
be very emotional, it can be very hard," she says. "It's really
rewarding to be with somebody who has had to go through this."
With two children at home, she is very careful and wary for them. "I'm
very aware everywhere that there are paedophiles anywhere, there's sexual
abuse anywhere, which is really awful but that's the way it is," says Ms
Humphris.
"Your're breaking the myths, some people say there's a myth around
public toilets, well, that's not actually a myth." Sexual offenders are
not just prowlers lurking in the night. "It's not what people expect, so
it's not the dark alley rape or the paedophile hiding behind the school
house. It's not that overt," she says.
"It happens in public places where parents are right there – swimming
pools - and they are not looking for the signs that could be right in front
of them."
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